In the grand scheme of things, I have been on this Earth for an eyeblink. I was born 30 years ago, which gives me about two and a half decades of useful, retrievable memories. Most of them are pretty normal; some of them are downright weird. All of them pale in comparison with this pile of nutso.

Say hello to the jet-powered, 320-mph school bus.

According to CBS News, what we have here is pretty simple: 42,000 horsepower; 21,000 pounds of thrust; the engine from an F4 fighter; flame paint. Flame paint, people. On a school bus that spits flame. Because, you know, why not?

If it gets better than that, I have no idea how. You wanna see video, right? Of course you do. You have a pulse. Guess what: We're going to give it to you.