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Religion thread 
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Pendulous
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Post Re: Religion thread
Doug Stanhope is so great.


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Sat Jan 11, 2014 2:17 am
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Simethicone
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Post Re: Religion thread
Tied for fifth-least here; I'd say we're doing well.
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Thu Jan 23, 2014 5:58 pm
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Simethicone
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Post Re: Religion thread
Anal Sex in Accordance With God's Will :dildo: :eekass:

Fisting And God's Will contains the heading "Fisting As An Act Of Faith", which would make an excellent lyric or title for the right sort of band.

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Sun Feb 02, 2014 1:37 am
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Simethicone
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Post Re: Religion thread
Legal Experts Gobsmacked After British Judge Orders Mormon Leader To Prove Faith's Origins

Quote:
Tom Phillips based his complaint on the Fraud Act of 2006, a British law that outlaws making a profit off of false representations. According to Phillips, this is precisely what the Mormon Church does — it uses statements it knows to be factually untrue in order to secure tithes from members of the Church.

The facts in question, court records show, are tenets of the Mormon faith, including that Joseph Smith translated The Book of Mormon from ancient gold plates, that Native Americans are descendants of a family of Israelites, and that death didn’t exist on this planet until 6,000 years ago.

“These are not statements of mere ‘beliefs’ or opinions or theories,” Phillips wrote. “They are made as actual facts and their truthfulness can be objectively tested with evidence.”

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Thu Feb 06, 2014 1:46 am
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Pendulous
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Post Re: Religion thread
And then if we apply that to like, stories of wooden boats carrying two of every animal on the planet...

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Thu Feb 06, 2014 10:37 pm
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Simethicone
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Post Re: Religion thread
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Mon Feb 17, 2014 12:59 am
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Pendulous
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Post Re: Religion thread
Hehe I'm with that guy and his penis. Wait, I meant...

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Sat Feb 22, 2014 12:24 pm
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Winston Wolf
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Post Re: Religion thread
Unstrung wrote:
Hehe I'm with that guy and his penis. Wait, I meant...

this explains a lot. :fag:

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Tue Feb 25, 2014 11:20 am
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Simethicone
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Post Re: Religion thread
If you believe:
The Earth is at the center of the universe, and
Heaven is above the Earth, Hell is under/inside it, and
Satan is at the center of Hell, then:

The universe revolves around Satan. :krampus:

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Fri Mar 14, 2014 6:26 pm
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Simethicone
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Post Re: Religion thread
This is in very poor taste:
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:lol:

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Sun Apr 06, 2014 1:38 am
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Winston Wolf
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Post Re: Religion thread
uhmmm yeah

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Tue Apr 15, 2014 1:12 pm
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Simethicone
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Post Re: Religion thread
If you kiss Hank's ass, He'll give you a million dollars; and if you don't, He'll kick the shit out of you.

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Thu Apr 17, 2014 1:24 am
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Tsardocasm
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Post Re: Religion thread

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Rydock wrote:
Sounds like a Domble :o



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Sat Apr 26, 2014 4:18 am
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Simethicone
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Post Re: Religion thread
Secrets Of Scientology: The E-Meter (with schematics)

EDIT: the schematics are on the index page: http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~dst/Secrets/E-Meter/index.html

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Sat Apr 26, 2014 7:32 pm
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Simethicone
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Sat May 10, 2014 3:00 pm
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Simethicone
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Sun May 11, 2014 8:30 pm
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Winston Wolf
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Fri Jun 20, 2014 3:17 pm
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Simethicone
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Post Re: Religion thread
Because Moses broke the first set of tablets with the Ten Commandments after the Israelites kept worshipping the Golden Calf. So Jehovah had him make a new set, with "the words that were on the first" (Exodus 34:1). Except they're not the same. So these, apparently, are the Ten Commandments you should be following. Let's get these posted in courtrooms, schools and government buildings all across Amurrica! The real Ten Commandments!

Exodus 34 wrote:

1. Thou shalt worship no other god: for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God.
2. Thou shalt make thee no molten gods.
3. The feast of unleavened bread shalt thou keep.
4. All that openeth the matrix is mine; and every firstling among thy cattle, whether ox or sheep, that is male.
5. Six days thou shalt work, but on the seventh day thou shalt rest.
6. Thou shalt observe the feast of weeks, of the firstfruits of wheat harvest, and the feast of ingathering at the year's end.
7. Thou shalt not offer the blood of my sacrifice with leaven.
8. Neither shall the sacrifice of the feast of the passover be left unto the morning.
9. The first of the firstfruits of thy land thou shalt bring unto the house of the Lord thy God.
10. Thou shalt not seethe a kid in his mother's milk.

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Tue Jul 15, 2014 12:08 am
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Winston Wolf
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Tue Jul 29, 2014 10:00 am
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Simethicone
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Post Re: Religion thread
:lol:
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Fri Aug 01, 2014 11:30 pm
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