This is awesome. Obviously he's a shredder, too.
This beats then Lt. Rommel capturing 1500 dudes with five guys in WWI, handily.
| Maplifiers http://maplifiers.net/forum/ |
|
| Great Mindfucks http://maplifiers.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=2818 |
Page 1 of 1 |
| Author: | torgeot [ Fri May 31, 2013 9:26 am ] |
| Post subject: | Great Mindfucks |
Chuko "Sleeping Dragon" Liang was a brilliant Chinese strategist. A chancellor of Shu Han during the third century, his cunning is widely so celebrated that in China his name is synonymous with intelligence and tactics, which is way better than General Tso, who only wound up with a Chinese restaurant dish named after him. Chuko was a master of the mindfuck. But he was still capable of making mistakes and it was his greatest miscalculation that required him to draw upon his greatest of mindfuck powers. According to historians, during the War of the Three Kingdoms, accompanied by a consort of just 100 soldiers and the rest of his army miles away, Chuko saw an opposing army with over 100,000 men marching towards him. The opposing general, Sima Yi, was a veteran who had fought Chuko in multiple battles. Familiar with the Sleeping Dragon's clever ways and, deciding to take no chances, he led the massive army to capture Chuko. Ordering his few men into hiding, Chuko commanded that the town gates be left wide open and, positioning himself atop the city wall, he proceeded to play the lute as the massive enemy army approached. Upon his arrival at the town gates, Sima Yi, who had fallen victim to many a Chuko-led ambush, halted his army and studied Chuko's calm manner as he ripped a solo on the chords. Convinced it was a trap he could not yet comprehend, Sima commanded a hasty retreat, more than a 100,000 soldiers pulling back from one man and his musical instrument. Chuko thus earned an entire wing in the Bullshitter's Hall of Fame. |
|
| Author: | Snaxocaster [ Fri May 31, 2013 10:54 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Great Mindfucks |
This is awesome. Obviously he's a shredder, too. This beats then Lt. Rommel capturing 1500 dudes with five guys in WWI, handily. |
|
| Author: | chris_d [ Fri May 31, 2013 7:31 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Great Mindfucks |
You know you are one badass sneaky mofo when enemies that know you are completely fucked, don't believe it. |
|
| Author: | Devtron [ Fri May 31, 2013 8:38 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Great Mindfucks |
First off, who the fuck uses the Wade-Giles system for Chineses to English transcription anymore? It's Zhuge Liang in the more widely used Pinyin system. And he is my favorite character from the Romance of the Three Kingdoms shit (including the Dynasty Warriors game), mainly because he is such a badass strategist who totally fucked shit up for the Shu dynasty (Liu Bei pretty much owed his success to Zhuge Liang's strategies.) The Wei dynasty (or Cao Wei, headed off by Cao Cao [cow-cow] originally and carried on by the Cao family) also had Sima Yi, who even though Zhuge Liang made him look like a fool a lot, was actually a really badass strategist as well. They definitely pulled a few over on each other throughout the war of the three kingdoms. Still, Zhuge got the last laugh it seemed, "The second battle between Sima Yi and Zhuge Liang was in 234. Cao Rui again identified Shu's problem being keeping their army supplied, and ordered Sima Yi to keep his armies fortified and wait the enemy out. The two armies faced each other at Wuzhang Plains. Although being challenged many times by Zhuge Liang, Sima Yi did not send his armies to attack. To provoke Sima Yi, Zhuge Liang sent women's clothes to him, suggesting that he was a woman for not daring to attack. The Wei officers were enraged by this, but Sima Yi would not be provoked. To appease his officers, Sima Yi asked the Wei emperor Cao Rui for permission to engage the Shu forces. Cao Rui, understanding the situation, sent his advisor Xin Pi to Sima Yi telling the Wei forces to be patient.[8] In an attempt to engage the Wei forces, Zhuge Liang sent Sima Yi an emissary urging him to battle. Sima Yi, however, would not discuss military matters with the emissary, instead enquired about Zhuge Liang's tasks. The emissary replied that Zhuge Liang personally managed all major and minor matters in the military, from military tactics to meals for the night, but he consumes very little. Sima Yi then told an aide that Zhuge Liang would not last long.[9] Following Zhuge Liang's death, the Shu forces quietly withdrew from their camps while keeping Zhuge Liang's death a secret. Sima Yi, convinced by the locals that Zhuge Liang had died, gave chase to the retreating Shu forces. Jiang Wei then had Yang Yi turn around and pretend to strike. Seeing this, Sima Yi feared that Zhuge Liang only pretended he was dead to lure him out, and immediately retreated. Word that Sima Yi fled from the already dead Zhuge Liang spread, spawning a popular saying, "A dead Zhuge scares away a living Zhongda" (死諸葛嚇走活仲達), referring to Sima Yi's style name. When Sima Yi heard of such ridicule, he laughingly responded, "I can predict the living, but not the dead." He also invented the wooden ox: "The wooden ox (木牛流馬，lit. wooden ox flowing horse) was created by Zhuge Liang while he served Shu-Han. It was a thought to be either a mechanical, walking replica of an ox hose main purpose was to carry supplies such as grain to an army that was running low on supplies or a sort of wheelbarrow that had 2 booms on which it was pulled (this was later reversed with the "gliding horse").[1]" |
|
| Page 1 of 1 | All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ] |
| Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/ |
|