Fuckin' high school kids clean up after themselves fer chrissakes. Cops just snag some joe and leave.

Fuckin' businessd00d suit-and-tie types (for the record, I'm wearing a pinstripe suit on my day off, because I can and don't give a shit ) leave their shit everywhere and make a fuckin' mess. This is not a full-service restaurant. There are no waiters. No one comes to your table (or couch, or chair, or whatever.) The staff does not circulate to attend to you. Yeah, someone will be around to clean the place every few hours. Because of you, asshole. Otherwise other patrons clean up after your mess because you apparently don't have the presence of mind to take your shit to the clearly designated location to be washed up. Also, there are trash cans, plural, there. It's always the business lunch crowd who just leaves shit wherever, too. Almost invariably.

In short: fuck you.

Ah yes. I remember it well. This is also almost universally true of affluent folks everywhere actually.

My very first job in high school was at an Au Bon Pain in the very upper middle class mall in my town. Later in life i spent two years putting in 70+ hour weeks managing a cafe and fancypizza place in an even more upper class town adjacent to that.

Not coincidentally. They are most likely to verbally abuse the fourteen-year-old female counter staff. They are ALSO the ones who are most inclined to go online and give bad reviews to the same places they frequent, generally not failing to note things like the self serve coffee station being in a disheveled state.

The worst offenders are invariably: 1. Business doods., 2. Neo-Hippies/Born Again proselytizers, and/or 3. The husbands of soccer moms.

Goddamn, having to tell a customer how to behave is one of my least favorite things. And i have been forced to do so far too many times.

Story checks out.

business doods like that usually work in finance, thoroughly suck a bucket of dicks. I am in a building on the same floor as a a stock market firm, and those guys are disgusting, they leave the bathroom in such a state.

coffee shops.... lol

I hate poor people.

They do tend to reproduce at an alarming rate, so perhaps we can raise them for food or use them as a renewable energy source?

I second this notion.

I believe this is unanimous.

The true test of a chef's ability is to cook human in a way that doesn't taste like chicken.

hmmm, roasted human with baby new potatoes and rosemary.


Chianti anyone?

Aren't they supposed to taste like pork?

Supposed to.

It helps to get them fresh.