Ill check on that.

i know I've done a lot of shows but once again, I am exhausted, but did make it into work. 4 shows 5 days, this wouldn't be so bad if that pesky needing-to-work-so-I-can-pay-the-mortgage thing wasn't always coming up.

Second day of switching over to a 9PM-7:30AM work schedule. Yes, you read that correctly. My own personal Christ, is it fucked up. I am unbelievably tired, though I cannot really sleep for multiple reasons.

yar, agreed that is a fucked up schedule. Great schedule should you be recording, but not so much for regular type jobbies.

My mom had a stroke Saturday evening and has been in the hospital since then. My family and I have been in and out for the past 36 hours and there seems to be a bit of improvement, but it looks pretty damn bad. Lots of blood in/on her brain. Talk about unfuckingexpected. I'm tired.
Really shitty timing too, as I had paying gigs lined up every day this week but had to cancel them

That super sucks. Several of my peoples have had stroke stuff going on, some more fairly recently as well.

Sometimes it just means a regimen of coumadin and some suffered memory loss, but sometimes it is worse. I hope for your moms it is not worse. Shit sucks.

aww shit. Sorry to hear that Indie. I hope things take a turn for the better.

We shall make sacrifices to BELT.

im drunk

- oh shit, sorry to hear about that ^, I hope your mom recovers well, and soon.

Mojo Alex

I have worked 15 days out of the past 16. All have been 10 hours or more with an exception of a 9 hour day. Since switching over to this fucked nightshift, I haven't been able to get more than 6 hours a sleep, and it's broken up and filled with weird dreams.

At the end of this, I am thinking indefinite hibernation.

I was totally lax about trimming back weeds from around the house, and now i have a ridiculous quantity of delicious wild blackberries to consume. Take that, fucking suburban norms.

Strongly approved. Free crops are free.

My holiday was incredible, a whole week of nonstop drinking in the sun was achieved successfully. I've forgotten what normal feels like, its been a constant mess of drunk/hungover/exhausted.

Wild berries you say? Mash them. Ferment them. Drink them!

Sometimes I look at pictures of myself, and particularly look at the proportions of my torso and legs, and just think to myself, "How did this happen?"



Pose was intentionally ridiculous.


Were my legs a sensical length, I would be a pretty tall d00d, I think.

I dunno man, i think the beard there, all by itself, might tend to throw off all the other proportional relationships.

That is indeed what it is there for (I think), to serve as a distraction. Or something?

I definitely miss that thing. And my fuck, shaving one's face is such a fucking pain in the ass, and then a literal pain in the face a couple days after when the hair is long enough to stab your neck. My neckbeard is retardedly robust, it is awful and murderous.

Yarr, shavin' is the worst. One of the main reasons i hate working with/like normal people at normal jobs.

Ah, and: I have decided that upon my return I am going to be trying to get ahold of peoples to give me vocal and guitar lessons. I have been working on getting my sense of meter together and it is sort of working, and the same goes for my ability to maintain proper pitch. Both though, I am sort of sketched on. P

Concerning the pitch thing:I am feeling like a lot of my problem is simply not having the air at the end of phrases (and not even long ones) to get up right on top of the note. I dunno what the fuck is up with that, I just know it takes a lot of volume for me to get up to a truly strong sounding voice. Like, I dunno if it's just a misinterpretation because my ears are so close to my mouth, but I do not know anyone who can sing as loud (loud, not well ) as I can. I mean, clearly they are out there, but the shit is fuckloud. My death metal vocals especially, short bursts, but way gravelly and with lots of projection. You can clearly hear me on the other side of my bigass house with dem wallz and all. Everyone I know has attested that I am, very loud at the DM thing, in comparison to "pros", as well.

And on the subject of time, I sort of wonder if there are wires in my head that have got fucked up through my life. Between finding out recently that I was dropped on my head real young (you should check the fat 1/2" or so dent in the top of my skull), the fact that I held my breath until I passed out when upset from the day I left the the hospital after being born until I was about three and the general dysfunction I have inherited for my parents (sweet fucking run-on sentence, Batman): I wonder if there is something fucked up with my brain. It is not always bad, but sometimes when I am trying to tap along to a beat I am setting purely with my head, my hands will rush the downbeat waaaay early. Like, not superhorrendously off, but certainly not on. Sometimes, I have to really try to land on the beat, it is kinda fucked up to me. It is like my brain is misfiring commands or some shit.

Or maybe, I am just too goddamn lazy and need to spend more time practicing my instruments.

Anyway, endrant. I have a lot of thoughts in my head tonight. And a good amount of booze in my belly.

Ah, and it is not even fucking night time. Well, for the non-vampires out there, atleast.